This INFJ’s Opinion On Morning Greetings…

 
Admittedly, I am not a morning person. It takes me at least an hour or so to warm up to the day.

Upon arriving to work, I’ve been “good morninged” at least 8 times before I even get to my work station. Let me put my things away and organize my thoughts before you start interrogating me about every little thing I’ve done since you last saw me. Yes! For a few of my coworkers, that’s what their good mornings lead into. Then there’s the particularly self centered coworker who talks about herself long after her good morning has been delivered….yet I’m the rude one when I walk away because I have work to do. Sorry. I’m here to work. 

I’m sure some of you will not agree or understand what I’m trying to say here. Why in the world would it bother me or anyone else to be greeted with a “good morning” by your coworkers?

It doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is their reaction to how I respond. When greeted with a “good morning” I generally nod in the direction of the greeter and smile or smile and say hi. Seems reasonable so far…are ya with me?

Most of my coworkers understand that I’m not Little Mary Sunshine right off the bat. It’s nothing personal. It’s just who I am at that time of day. Give me a few hours and I’ll be fine, but some of them just don’t get it.

I’ve been asked soooo many times…what’s wrong…why are you in a bad mood…why are you being rude? I’m not. I’ve acknowledged their good morning, I just didn’t acknowledge it in the way they wanted me to. 

My personal favorite is…why are you so quiet? Well gosh, I don’t know! Why are you so loud? I think we can all agree, that would be rude for me to say. Why isn’t it considered rude for them to question my quietness? 

I actually enjoy silence. I don’t feel the need to fill that silence with endless questions or small talk like some of my coworkers do. I talk to patients all day. I don’t need to have a 10 minute conversation with you about what you had for supper last night while I’m trying to finish up paperwork. If you have something meaningful or important to say, I’m all ears. Don’t talk just because you’re uncomfortable when things get quiet and then try to make me feel like there’s something wrong with me because I don’t participate in mindless chatter with you. Smiling politely and an occasional word or two is all your gonna get from me. 

I guess what I’m trying to say is, I understand and respect my coworkers need for a morning greeting. They’re my friends and I enjoy and want to hear about what’s going on in their lives, but I’d also like my need for silence to be respected. Rest assured, if I have something meaningful to say, I’ll say it. Don’t try to make me feel bad or that there’s something wrong with me because I’m quiet. I’m not being rude. I’m not sad. I’m not depressed. It’s who I am.

Sincerely,

The Grinch Who Steals Morning Greetings❤️

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Melancholy, INFJs, and Quotes…

Melancholy…the feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause. Or as I like to define it…and then suddenly I became sad for no reason at all.

There’s not a thing going on in my life to make me feel sad, but a few days ago this feeling of melancholy hit me out of the blue.

Maybe it’s the fact that the days are shorter now. Perhaps it’s because through the years I’ve had a lot of life changing events occur between now and the end of the year.

It could be because my birthday is just around the corner and I’ll be another year older. I don’t mean to complain. I know it’s just a number, but I also know I’m not invincible like I once thought when I was younger. Regardless of the cause, it always seems to hit me around this time of year. 

The reason I’m writing about this today is because it started me thinking about my personality type. Im an INFJ and I’ve read that those of us with this personality type tend to be prone to feelings of melancholy. Perhaps it’s the way we see the world and the depth to so many things.

I’m not sure I would say that I am melancholic in nature…. I don’t always feel this way. I have my moments and I recover quickly. Sometimes I feel quite content, joyful even a little spunky. I’m a bit complex and I don’t always know exactly how I feel. I can be moody and my mood can change quickly, but I do try to hide it when I feel sad. Some times I can, but most times I’m somber and withdrawn when the meloncholy strikes. Let’s just say I’m not a good actress when it comes to hiding how I feel, but I am a hopeless optimist. However sad or upset I may become, to whatever depths of depression I may descend, it is impossible for me to lose hope entirely. 

I’m curious to see how other INFJs feel about melancholy and our personality type. I feel most of the time INFJs are very positive people, but at the same time there’s something in our eyes that makes people ask “Are you okay?” Is it because of our complexity? Our differences from society? Our need to have answers and figure things out? Are INFJs sad in nature?  I’m very curious. 

At our core, when the doors are locked and the shutters closed…maybe we let the melancholy take over for awhile, but at the same time we can be incredibly positive, upbeat, loving people when we are all by ourselves. We’re complicated like that!

We are very layered which is both a gift and a curse. We have so much “stuff” to figure out about everything including ourselves. In a world that’s increasingly fake and a society that keeps pushing people to “be happy” by taking pills and denying reality, a little melancholy truthfulness is needed sometimes…and a breath of fresh air. 

Any thoughts? Feel free to discuss.

In the meantime here are some quotes by author JmStorm. If you know who he is let me know because I couldn’t find much info about him. I did find these quotes on Pinterest and what better way to express yourself when you’re melancholy than with quotes! Interestingly enough, the first and last quotes deal with “the door”.

*Sometimes we shut the door on the things and people we care about because we know. We know that if it was right they wouldn’t be on the other side.

*I’ve learned that waiting for another to give you closure is like waiting for the dead to bury themselves. Do yourself a favor and grab a shovel.

*She’s strong, but not in the way most people think. She cares more than she’ll ever get back and she knows it. And yet she cares anyway.

*How odd it is that so much of what isn’t said, isn’t said because it’s the truth.

*Never look to be fed by the one who could stand there and watch you starve.

*One day I put together the puzzle of who I always was. And I was okay with being the only one who understood.

*Pay close attention to the manner in which one closes the door. Burn it into your mind. Good or bad, that is who they really are.

For what it’s worth when I think of this last quote I not only think about the INFJ door but also the door to my home. If you were to come to my home, I would not shut the door as soon as you walk out. I’ll always walk you to the door and most times I’ll even walk outside with you. I stand there until you drive away and wave at you as you go. Then I shut the door. Always have. Always will.

It’s sort of like the INFJ “door”… I just can’t “close” the door until I know you’re “gone”. I don’t know if the metaphor makes sense to everyone, but it makes sense to me.

The Ultimate Square Peg…

I finally have confirmation that I am indeed special! I have one of the rarest personality types worldwide…only 1 -3 percent of the population shares this personality type with me. This explains why people don’t “get” me and I’m often times misunderstood.

My personality type is called INFJ – T


I don’t know how accurate this test really is, but I will say the description was very accurate. I asked a few friends to take the test as well, just to see if their personalities matched up with their test results. Theirs were also very accurate and described them almost perfectly. 

The Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is an introspective self-report questionnaire designed to indicate psychological preferences in how people perceive the world and make decisions. The MBTI was constructed by Katharine Cook Briggs and her daughter Isabel Briggs Myers. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator assessment was designed to help you better understand what makes you tick, how you relate to others, and how you can benefit from this knowledge in everyday life.

Here’s the link if you’d like to take it for yourself. It really is very interesting. I’m including the free link versus the one that asks you to pay $50. Who wants to pay when you can get the results for free?!?!  Feel free to leave your results in the comments and voice if you agree with them or not. If you’re also an INFJ, congratulations on being an extremely rare gem. Those aren’t my words, but they were part of the assessment. Let me know if you are an INFJ because we’ve got to stick together. It’s part of my personality to know these things! Lol

https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
In the meantime, I’ve included a few interesting facts about my personality type. 


Famous INFJs


The INFJ door slam…could be a post all on its own!





How to know if you’re an INFJ…


We just know…


Not a superhero…


Anger…

Personality…





You know nothing…



***all images from Google or Pinterest