Life In The Single Lane…

I’m back on track to what I intended to write about last week. I’m glad I wrote “It’s The End Of A Chapter, Not The Book.” Sometimes the unplanned writings turn out okay.  I suppose I could have titled it “To Infinity And Beyond…Part 3”, but I only thought of that just now.

Thank you to everyone who read it. The comments that were left were very kind and much appreciated. 

Life in the single lane?  I’m in no rush to get back into the dating scene. I have no desire to be in a relationship or date anyone seriously at this time because I choose to just be me for awhile. I love it! There’s no drama. No compromising. No unfulfilled expectations.

I’ve been divorced for over a year and a half. I’ve been on a handful of dates with some nice men and a few not so nice men, but no one that I’m interested in seeing more than once. I’m just very particular and that’s a good thing as far as I’m concerned. 

There is one gentleman that I go to dinner or to the movies with occasionally, but just as friends. It’s platonic and it’s nice. There’s no pressure or drama to deal with and it’s a good way to ease myself into learning how to interact with other men after being married for 16 years.

After my divorce I didn’t know who I was anymore. I wasn’t the woman I was before I married and I wasn’t the woman I was while I was married. It didn’t freak me out or scare me to realize this. To know that I could just be me and do what I wanted, when I wanted, was exciting. 

My daughter is the main priority in my life right now. She’s another reason I’m in no hurry to be in a relationship. She’s just starting to date and she’s going to need my expertise to guide her in the right direction. Pray for me by the way! My focus is on her. Finding men to date is not a priority. I have friends who are “lost” if they’re not in a relationship, but that’s not me or something I even understand.

I have learned that the dating scene hasn’t changed all that much since my dating days before I was married. This isn’t an “I hate men” part of the post. I love men and there are a lot of great guys out there, but there are still players, men who will use you, and men who will say whatever needed to gain your favor. 

My ex husband had some serious issues, so presently I’m very cautious and not as trusting as I once was. Since my divorce, there was one man I began to slowly trust. I threw caution to the wind, but that didn’t work out too well for me. Live and learn!

And now there’s “ghosting”,benching“, and the latest term I read about recently, “zombieing”! In the old days it was called…”I’m just not that into you, but I’ll keep you around just in case”. 

I blame a big part of these new relationship trends on technology and the way people meet and interact with one another. You can “meet” someone instantly with the click of a button. That makes it really easy to pull a “Houdini” on someone and disappear just as quickly, with no thought or remorse about how it makes the other person feel. 

I could write an entire post on the messages I receive through the games I play on my phone. It’s crazy that people think I’ll just give up my phone number or access to my Facebook simply because they ask and want it. Uh…NO!!! I’m a private person outside of the blogosphere, but even if I wasn’t, I’d never consider giving out any of my info to a stranger. The only person I ever gave that info to was “Buzz” and that was after months of talking to him and getting to know him.

Ok, this post is getting longer than I wanted and I’m getting off track again, so I might write more another time if people show interest in it. If not, I’ll probably still continue with the topic! It’s my blog after all! Lol

In the meantime, I’ll just keep figuring out who I am and continue to be me. 

https://free2bme27.wordpress.com/2016/09/30/its-the-end-of-a-chapter-not-the-book/

This is the spontaneous post that sidetracked me last week. If you’re interested in reading please click on the link above.🙋🏻

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8 thoughts on “Life In The Single Lane…

  1. I enjoy your writing! Believe me it will be worth the wait when you do meet the right person again ! You will know it ! I have been through another marriage and I had 2 kids and I was nervous about finding someone again! But it was worth all the waiting now I will be married for 22 years on Saturday ! I pray you will too when it’s Gods perfect timing ! 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad to know that you enjoy reading my blog! Thank you!

      I may be one of those people who aren’t meant to be married, and if so, that’s ok. Right now I’m happy with my life the way it is, but you’re right….God may have other plans for me down the road.

      It makes me smile to know that you finally got your “happily ever after”! Thank you for sharing a part of your story.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve never been in a serious relationship and I’m 29! Like crikey mate! I did date this one guy for 3 months earlier this year and I fell head over heels in love (i’d known him as a friend for a year and we had all these friends in common). But the bastard decided to move cities for better pay! I will give you this one piece of advice; never EVER enter a long distance relationship. EVER. People might say ‘oh yes but it worked for me’ or ‘If a relationship stays together during a LDR it was meant to be.’ That’s a bunch of baloney. Long distance relationships CAN last, but it’s incredibly painful. My boyfriend ended up ghosting me for a few days and I decided enough was enough and dumped him. I was perfectly content being single and he completely ruined it for me. I think I might be single forever now hahaha…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Before I was married I was in a LDR for 6 years. We were 3 hours distance apart and we’re engaged for a part of that 6 years. We took turns visiting one another every few weeks…vacationed together…all the normal things couples do only not as often. It actually worked well for me because I like my freedom when I’m in a relationship, but in the end it didn’t work out. I’m not sure distance played a big role in it, but we did grow apart over time and I ended it. We are still friends so it wasn’t a total loss. I’m sorry to hear your experience did not go well.

      As far as saying you might be single forever….never say never! Lol It can happen when you least expect it. Enjoy your life and when you’re ready and the time is right, you might change your mind.

      Thank you for reading and sharing a part of your story!

      Liked by 1 person

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